Welcome to My World of BGP....

I am going to let you in on a little secret... I am a busty girl.  OK, so that isn't a secret.  Anyone with eyes knows that.  However, the secret is no one really knows how busty I truly am... myself included!  In the last year and a half I have gone through 3 different bra sizes and it isn't because my body has changed dramatically.  It is because I never knew how bras are supposed to fit!  Did you know that coming home crying because your bra hurts wasn't normal?  I sure as hell didn't!  I just assumed that is just how it was and that coming home and taking that sucker off was the best feeling in the world. I know I can't be the only person out there who is suffering due to ill-fitting bras and lack of availability out there.  I decided to do this post and share my experiences, frustrations, and things that I have found and NEVER knew!  Welcome to my world of BGP (busty girl problems)...

Image by Gabbi3083791 via Someecards

For years I didn't know my bra size (I still don't).  I was one of those girls who developed over night.  One day I was flat and the next I was like a C. What can I say?  I come from a long line of busty women.  I was on my own though.  I didn't have anyone to teach me the ways of the bra, not even basic fit principles.  I didn't know the gore is supposed to lay flat on your chest (I didn't know it had a name) or that you could get fitted (I didn't learn about bra fittings until I was in my 20's).  These things among others I learned recently, but I should have learned YEARS AGO!

In high school I just assumed I was a DD.  It was the largest that I had ever heard of or could find in a store.  Then years later I met my friend Jakki and she gave me a little more insight on sizes (basically she's smaller than me, but bigger than a DD).  So I made an "educated" guess that I was a G.  I was dumbfounded.  Where the hell was I going to find a G?   Luckily for me Jakki knew of a site that I could go to.  I ordered one online from Bare Necessities.  It definitely fit better, but I didn't know any better either.  So I went on that way for years.

Last year I was presented with the opportunity to get sized at Lane Bryant.  I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THE IMPORTANCE OF GETTING SIZED!!  Not just sized, but properly sized. I never did it because it was a moot point for me.  There was never a place that offered the service that carried anything close to my size.  I went to Lane Bryant in a bind.  I needed a strapless bra to go with a dress that I had gotten for a wedding (my current strapless bra was too high cut).  I knew I wouldn't be able to order one and get it on time and I also knew I couldn't guarantee it would work even if I did.  So I went with the hopes that I could find something that fit decently that I could wear for at least that one evening.  I was surprised by the size selection and when I was offered a bra fitting.  I couldn't pass that up.  I had been wondering for years.  She determined that I was a 36H (side note... she said the sweetest thing in the world to me, "Girl your natural waist is tiny!").  She didn't have a 36H in stock, but she did have a 38H.  So I tried that one on.  I couldn't breathe.  There was no denying that the cups were way better, but not breathing wasn't an option.  So I tried a 40H... much better!  Again, not knowing how it was supposed to fit, I thought this was fantastic.  I finally knew my size.

Image by Rampaige on her blog Busty Girl Comics

Well, while shopping online about two weeks ago for some new bras I decided to see if Livirae sold anything online (the store that is featured on Lifetime's show DoubleDivas).  They do, but before you can browse you have to go through an online fitting.  These two ladies are the boob experts so I am not surprised they set up their site that way.  So for the second time in less than a year, I was going through a bra fitting.  It was very educational.  That's how I learned that the gore is supposed to touch your chest (and that is called a gore).  Turns out, according to that fitting I am a 36J.

36J!!  SHUT THE HELL UP!!  I am not denying I am a big girl, but a J?  SERIOUSLY?  Never in my wildest dreams did I think I was a J.  I was in shock when the lady at Lane Bryant said I was an H.  I mean, I could already wear one side of my bra as a hat... and now I am being told that I am bigger?  It's already a pain in the ass to find bras in an H.  I'm still in my 20's, I DON'T WANT TO WEAR A GRANDMA BRA!  Cute or sexy bras are bloody near impossible to find and now I have to search for them in an even bigger cup size?  I had literally just discovered a new site called Adore Me and I was beyond excited to try.  I bought two bra sets and now I wasn't going to be able to wear them!  I had all these questions and concerns flowing through my head.  Is there even a company that makes a strapless bra in a J?  Am I never going to wear my beloved halter or strapless style dresses ever again?  Am I really a 36?  Am I really a J?  I can't fly to Georgia to have one of the ladies at Livirae fit me, so how can I really know?

I can't be the only person out there this irked and clueless.  I reached out to my friends and asked if they were as confused as I was when it comes to bras.  My friend Jakki is in the same boat now (sorry to burst your bubble love).  I told her the things that I have found out and she's questioning her fit ("That part is supposed to touch your body?  Mine in nowhere near my body!").  I want to know once and for all what size I am.  I want to know how a bra is properly supposed to fit, and I want to be able to try that sucker on before I purchase it!!  Don't misunderstand my meaning; I have no issues with buying online.  90% of my purchasing is done online, but bras are not cheap.  I am not saying they should be either, but it is absurd to be spending $60 or more on a bra (not including tax or shipping and handling) on something that doesn't even fit.  Then having to deal with the hassle of repackaging and paying for shipping again to return it!

Image by Rampaige from her blog Busty Girl Comics

I decided to purchase a 36J to see how it fits.  I actually found some on sale from Simply Be, so I ordered a few.  I also decided I would exchange the sets I got from Adore Me to see if one of the sister sizes would work for me (yes, another new discovery).  I crossed my fingers and waited.  The day finally came when they arrived, and guess what?  

THEY ARE STILL TOO FUCKING SMALL!!!!!!!  

My new bras... that I can't wear....

I cried.  Genuine tears of defeat and discouragement.  This is officially ludicrous!!  I don't know what to do anymore!!!  What is my next step?  What cup size would even be next?  JJ?  K?  This sucks... not to mention being this upset over a bra makes me feel stupid.  Once again I vented to some of my close friends... my friend Dana gave me the best reaction, "Jeani!  Your boobs are halfway down the alphabet!!"

Still stewing in frustration I decided my only saving grace would to become educated in the bra world.  I found some sites with helpful tips and such including this wikihow site that gave me tips for a bra fitting that I can do on my own... problem being that they stop at a J cup.  Again, where do I go from here!?  Another site that I found in my research wash True & Co.  They also have an online fit profile that also focuses on shape which is nice.  They don't go up to my size, but there is potential with this company.  They are always looking to expand and have fit testing sessions.  They are based out of San Francisco, so I totally emailed them and asked to be apart of it.  I have actually happened upon a few sites with decent bras, like this bra from Bigger Bras that is about $40, not horrendous looking, and is available up to a K cup in UK sizes!  I order this bra in a 36H & 36HH which are the UK equivalent to a K and L cup.  Lord, help me if one of those don't fit!  

I am just starting out my journey, so please... I am asking all of my fellow busty girls out there... where are your favorite places to purchase?  What have your fails and successes been?  What brands do you love?  Is there anyone in the Bay Area of Nor Cal that knows where I can get properly sized AND try on in the same place?  Are there any sites you think I should check out?  Any help or suggestions would be lovely!